At 62, I finally retired my husband's one good shirt
At 62, I finally retired my husband's one good shirt
Six things the Martin gets right that every other shirt in his wardrobe got wrong, from a wife who has watched the same checked shirt go to every do since 2009.
Caroline Richards · Customer · Nottinghamshire · 5 min read
Let me be plain about who is talking, because it is not the man in the photograph. I am Caroline, I am 62, I live in Nottinghamshire, and that is my husband Derek, who is 68 and has never once in his life thought about a shirt for longer than it takes to put one on. So I am writing this for him.
The shirt he has on is called the Martin, from Nottingham Boutique, a small boutique that has been quietly dressing the two of us for a few years now. I bought it as a present. When the boutique later asked if they could put my letter up for other women to read, I said yes, on the condition that I could be completely honest in it, including about the shirt it replaced.
How it happens
Every man of a certain age has one good shirt. Derek's is a beige and brown check that I think his sister bought him in about 2009. It has been to two weddings, three funerals, every Christmas lunch and every anniversary meal we have had since, and by now the collar points curl up at the ends like a pair of old sandwiches and one cuff has gone soft and fuzzy along the edge.
The good shirt. Retired, with full honours.
And I have tried. I have bought that man shirts for birthdays and Christmases for forty years, and they hang in the wardrobe with the labels on while the check goes out of the door on his back.
What I had wrong
I thought he just liked the check. He does not. I went through the ones he never wears last month and it was obvious what had been going on. Everything I had ever bought him made him look one of two ages.
There were the sensible ones, beige and fawn and little checks, that made him look eighty before he had even sat down. And there was everything in the shops aimed at younger men, skinny and shiny and covered in tiny prints, which on a man of 68 with a bit of a tummy looks like he is off to a nightclub in 1997. Too old or too young, so he did the sensible thing and kept wearing the one he had.
He was never refusing a new shirt. He was refusing to look either eighty or like he was trying too hard.
What he needed was the shirt in between. A plain, proper, smart shirt in a good colour, with one small finishing detail that makes it look like it cost more than it did. That is what the Martin is.
The day it came. I did not wait for an occasion.
THE COLLAR STAYS WHERE IT SHOULD
This is the one I noticed first, after fifteen years of curling collar points. The Martin has a button down collar, so each collar point is held down to the front of the shirt with a tiny button. It cannot curl, it cannot flip up under a jumper, and it cannot wander off sideways halfway through lunch. It just sits there looking tidy all day, with or without a tie, which in Derek's case is always without.
The little buttons on the collar points, and the black trim inside.
The collar actually stays down. My husband's shirts always end up with the points flapping about. Not this one.
Linda P., ArnoldTHE LITTLE BLACK LINE THAT MAKES IT LOOK EXPENSIVE
Inside the collar band and inside the cuffs there is a thin black trim. You do not see it when the shirt is buttoned to the top, but the moment he undoes the top button, or turns the cuffs back to wash his hands, there it is, a neat dark line round the neck and the wrists. It is a very small thing and it is the reason the shirt looks finished rather than plain. Our daughter asked him where he had got it before she had even taken her coat off.
Doing his cuffs up before we went out. He did not know I was taking this.
Bought for my husband's 70th. Everybody commented on the collar detail. He looked so smart.
Christine A., BeestonSMART, WITHOUT LOOKING LIKE HE IS TRYING
The colour is a soft light blue, which is about the kindest colour you can put next to a man's face at our age, and the fabric is smooth with just a little soft sheen to it, so it looks fresh rather than flat. It is a proper tailored shirt shape, smart enough with his navy jacket for a do and easy enough on its own with chinos for a Sunday. No prints, no logos, nothing that shouts.
Smart without being stuffy. I wear it to the club with a jacket and on its own for Sunday dinner.
Roy D., HucknallA POCKET FOR HIS READING GLASSES
There is a plain pocket on the chest. I would not have thought to mention it, except that Derek's reading glasses have lived in the top pocket of every shirt he has ever owned, and the last two I bought him did not have one. So the glasses went in his trouser pocket and got sat on. This one has a pocket. Problem solved, and the glasses have survived the month.
Proper shirt with a proper pocket. Glasses in, pen in, off he goes.
Maureen T., CarltonHOW I GOT HIS SIZE RIGHT WITHOUT ASKING
Buying a man a shirt as a surprise is mostly a question of not getting caught looking at his labels. My trick is to check the size in the shirt he actually wears most, not the one he says he is. The boutique describes the Martin as a tailored fit and says to go one size up if he is between sizes or likes it looser, so I did exactly that, and it fits him with room across the tummy and the shoulders, which is what he likes. And if I had got it wrong, there are 30 days to send it back, which is the thing that makes buying clothes for somebody else feel safe.
Took the advice and went one size up for my husband. Perfect fit, plenty of room.
Janet H., West BridgfordHE WORE IT WITHOUT BEING TOLD
This is the one that told me I had finally got it right. A man will say "very nice, love" about anything you give him. What matters is what he puts on when you are not looking. Last Sunday we went to the pub in the village for our anniversary lunch, and I came downstairs fully expecting to see the check. He was standing in the hall in the Martin. Nobody had said a word. Then on the way home he asked me if they did it in the brighter blue as well.
It hangs on the front of the wardrobe now, ready for the next do.
My wife bought me one and I have since bought two more myself. Best shirts I have owned in years.
Geoff S., MansfieldThe Martin, against the shirts in his wardrobe before
There were nine of them in there, plus the one he actually wore. Here is the difference, laid out plainly.
Beige checks that made him look eighty
Shiny skinny cuts that made him look like he was trying
Collar points that curl after a few washes
No pocket for his glasses
Still in the wardrobe with the labels on
A plain smart shirt in a soft light blue
A thin black trim that makes it look finished
A button down collar that stays where it should
A chest pocket for his reading glasses
Worn to the anniversary lunch without a word from me
About the price
The Martin is £32.95. It was £66.00.
I will pass on what the boutique told me, which is that the autumn sale is on and the middle sizes go first. Their words, not mine. What I can tell you from my side is that I have spent a great deal more than that over the years on shirts that never left the wardrobe, which is the comparison I would actually make.
And I do not trust perfect scores, so I read the reviews before I ordered. Just over three hundred of them, sitting at 4.2 stars, which sounded like real people rather than robots, so I read on. Half of them are wives like me who bought it as a present, and the other half are the men, which I found rather touching.
Laid out for Sunday. He does not need me to do this any more, but old habits.
What I would tell you if we were friends
If you and I were sat in my kitchen with a cup of tea and you asked me, this is what I would say. Go and look at the shirt your husband wears to every do. If the collar has curled and the cuffs have gone fuzzy and it is older than some of your grandchildren, he is not being stubborn. He has simply never been given one that did not make him look either eighty or like he was trying too hard.
Forty years of buying him shirts, and it turns out I only ever needed to buy him the right one.
The invitations for the end of the year will start arriving any day now. Get it in the wardrobe before they do, and see what he reaches for.
Caroline
MARTIN | Long Sleeve Button-Down Shirt
- Button down collar that stays neat all day
- Thin black contrast trim inside the collar and cuffs
- Tailored shape, go one size up for a looser fit
- Chest pocket for glasses or a pen
- Two button cuffs and a full button front
- Light blue, blue, white, black, teal, burgundy or purple
- Free UK delivery and 30 day returns
The autumn sale is on now, half price. The middle sizes go first.